GYM TONIGHT!

Wow. What a month January has been. Lots of traveling for work and lots of fun had by all. My colleague and I traveled to two different conferences (one in Kansas City and the other in Phoenix) to present on BGSU's Centennial Milestone Celebration. Both presentations went very well and our audience was fantastic. They loved everything we had to share. It was a great feeling of accomplishment, reviewing the last year of celebrations, traveling, events, programs, etc. Both travel trips were fun, although, Kansas City was more fun than Phoenix. Phoenix seemed "dead" as a city. Perhaps the time of year? Perhaps the time of the week? Either way, great to travel to cities I have not yet explored.

Next trips? Florida, DC, Denver, Pittsburgh, and Chicago. Good to be busy! I like to be busy. But sad, when Troy and I are crossing paths in the air (literally).

I find it somewhat easy to maintain my work-out schedules, while traveling. I also pack my gear (for both indoor and outdoor work-outs) and make it happen. I mean, some days I can't. But, for the most I do. But, it will be nice to be home for a few weeks before Florida and get some YMCA gym time in, along with some doubles. I started doing a variety of doubles last week and love it. I love the hard work and knowing the results will pay off. I have never been this focused before and I am pumped.

I really need to finalize my summer triathlon schedule. I have decided to wait for the half ironman, as originally planned, and compete in this race 2012. I do think, I will chose Syracuse. I would love for some of family, friends, etc. to be present (if they want to be). And Syracuse is the closest one. Wow, super scary, but super exciting at the same time.

Troy has his weekend MBA classes this weekend. So tonight, we date-it-up at the gym, followed by dinner. So simple and yet, I love it. Looking forward to a great work-out and heavy lift. Not sure if my upper body is ready, but here it comes.

Super fun announcement: Julie, myself, and three of her friends (most of which I know) will be headed to..... (wait for it)...... (wait for it)....

CABO BABY!!!!!!

April 2012...Julie turns 40  and so Cabo here we come. Side note, my sister does not look 40. We are all very excited. I am working out the details as we speak. Can't wait for this vacation - it might just be EPIC. Might? It will be.

Between the half ironman, my own personal goals and the Cabo vacation.... there should be some major transformations going on.... both mentally and physically. I like it. I like it a lot.

Pool Deck

I was on a pool desk last night. I watched pieces of a highschool men's swim meet. Wow, I miss being on a deck. I miss the smell of chlorine. I miss the team spirit. I miss counting during the 500 or 1000 or 1650. I miss it all.

I love...

I was watching a past episode of Oprah earlier this morning (prolonging cleaning, more painting, some packing, and a trip to the gym) and I watched the special on the Australian couple. The husband is currently battling both liver and bowel cancer. The video he made for his wife, Rachel, is amazing. Find it at this link:

LOVE

Watch the video and be amazed at the power of love. I am generally a positive person, so to list all the people/animals/items I love, would take a lifetime (as is true for most). But, because this is my blog and I get to write about what I want... I am going to take a moment to write a few highlights of my love. In no particular order:

1. Troy. Know it. Be it. Bestfriend. Fate. Lifetime of dreams. Lifetime of laughter. Lucky.

2. Bailey. Cuddles. Grunts of love. Short hair. Anti-water dog.

3. Captain. Big cuddles. Smelly farts. Too much hair to clean. Water dog.

4. Sunsets. Red skies. Boat wakes. Boating. Sun kissed skin. Sun bleached hair. Chipped nailpolish.

5. Family. Laughter. Jokes. Wine. Nicknames.

6. Friends. Honesty. Convesations. Advice. Challenges. Support.

7. Manicures. Pedicures. Flip-flops. Shoes. Bathing suits. Nail polish. Accessories. Clothes.

8. Raisin Brain cereal.

9. 1000 Island. St. Lawrence River. Islands. Family blood. Tibbitts Point.

10. Sister. Loud. Laughter. Music. Baking. Not cooking. Decorating. Dollar Store.

I am sure, this list, makes very little sense to those reading. To me, it represents some of my life. Some of my loves. And some of my motivation.

To live a life filled with love, support and happiness... one has lived well.

Do I dare?

As I was scanning the web last night, to attempt to "finalize" my summer race calendar, I found the Syracuse Half 70.3 for September 2011. Now, remember, my goal is to complete my first Half Ironman in Spring/Summer 2012. But, I stopped, I clicked, and I read.

September 2011 - could I do it, would I be ready, will the weather be crappy in September? So many questions....... what is a girl to do?!

I asked Troy's input and of course it was this: "I will support you no matter what." I mean sometimes, for real, give it to me straight Ballard. Like, "You're not ready, you're not strong enough yet, you need to overcome your hate of running, you need to get aero bars for your bike." But.... that is not what I heard. Blah.

Needless to say, my mind has been racing with the "what-ifs" since I found this race. I know, I'm definitely in for an Olympic Tri in May, swimming a relay with EH and SG in June (may even bootleg that one and finish it up, to get the yardage in), still need a tri for July, pretty sure I have my Olympic picked out for August.... but now, Syracuse. It is there - in the back of my head and it isn't leaving.

All during my outdoor, glorious winter run today (I forgot how wonderful winter runs can be!), I thought of one thing only: The Half. I thought about crossing the finish line. I thought about seeing Troy at the end of it. I thought about the pain. I thought about the mental triumph. I thought about "that" girl I once was and I thought about the woman I now am. I thought and I thought and I thought some more. Yet, no decision.

Perhaps a good lift tonight, at the gym will help. Either way, I have a decision to make. I'm either all in for September 2011 or I'm all in for 2012. Either way, I'm doing it.

Mirrors

Friday night, Troy and I headed to our favorite Y, to get in a solid 2 hour gym date. As my Facebook status said that night - I know, very lame, but at least healthy. Anyways, we started out with a run on the treadmill. And no, we do not do the exact same workout, at the exact same time. We are not that lame.

I am not a fan of treadmills. For the most part, I would rather be outside running, than on a black mat that spins in a circle. But Michigan finally has been hit with some winter snow and the temps were frigid, so treadmill it is. I started out with a nice slow jog and eventually I was doing another sprint/walk workout. 35 minutes later I was covered in sweat and feeling oh so very accomplished.

But, during the middle of my workout, I looked up to find this huge mirror in front of all the treadmill runners. I mean, why? Why, must be have a mirror in front of us, when we run? I don't want to know what I look like. I know I should. I know I should care, for my form. But, yah, I really don't want to see my legs, arm, sweat, earphones, face, etc. I would rather just run. Because in my head, inside my run, I am me. There, I am not judging my appearance to anyone else around me. But, at that moment, when I looked up and saw myself, I immediately fell into the self-conscience "oh my lord, look at me, I am so fat". But, I kept on running. Finished it, moved onto the bike, and then finished out with upper arm lift and abs. 2 hours later, it was a quality workout.

But, those mirrors. They kept bothering me. On the way home, I was talking to Troy about it and how uncomfortable it made me. And this was my husband's, kind and caring remarks:

" Is that really how a woman's mind works and thinks? I don't know what to say, because I don't think like that. Either way, if you are worried about other people judging you in the gym F-them. That's not what the gym is about. The gym is about you and your own self improvement. It is not about worrying about what others' are thinking/seeing."

I really hate when he is right.

I know, for most women (and I do not mean to speak for all - this is just my opinion), we struggle with self image. It doesn't matter our height, our weight, our BMI, our fat percentage, our muscles, etc.  - we struggle. And the farther I go through this journey of weight loss and healthy living, the more I realize how much I not only need to improve the physical, but the mental as well. Someday, I will be on that treadmill, and not worry about the image in front of me. Someday, I will not worry about always being the tallest woman in the bar (and yes, I still wear heels). And someday, it will all come together. Until then...I'll  keep on doing what I do, with a smile. A smile always helps. :)

Kindness

Anyone that read my FB post around 7 p.m., knows where I was tonight - the pool. And let me say this loud and clear: I DID NOT want to go. I wanted to remain on the couch, watching my DVR'd Biggest Loser episode from last night and "take the night off." Sigh. I went. And now I am home, reeking like chlorine, but of course very happy and satisfied that I pulled my shit together and went.

I am glad I went. The simplest act of kindness happened to me and it came from 2 girls, probably about 10 years old. I walked onto the lap pool deck and thought, awesome, open swim. Open swim = 2 lanes of lap swim only, while the remainder of the pool is filled with families, bobbers, divers, etc. And I write bobbers, I am not referring to fishing bobbers. You figure it out.  Needless to say, I instantly went negative in my head and thought, this workout is going to blow. I'm not going to have a decent lap, the pool wake is going to be horrible, etc. etc. etc.

And as I was standing there, surveying the situation, trying to figure out which lap lane I wanted to invade to get some yardage in, these two young girls swam from the shallow end to the deep end. Pulled off their goggles and said:

Girls: Ms, are you looking for a lane?

Me: Yes, I definitely am.

Girls: You can have our lane (they were in lane 2 = WAY BETTER THAN LANE 1. Lane 1 is next to the wall... I hate the outer lanes). We can finish our 500 yards tomorrow night.

*Remember, they are about 10.

Me: But are you finished with your swim?

Girls: No, but that's okay. We have been swimming for about 30 minutes and you look like a real good swimmer that needs a lane. (I am not making this up).

Me: Oh my gosh, you girls are so nice. Yes, I would love your lane, if you are sure.

So, they climbed out, I thanked them again, and proceeded to have a fabulous evening swim, in lane 2.

What great girls. Thanks to their parents for raising them with manners and instilling in them the importance of kindness. A simple act of kindness goes a long way.

1999-2003

I thoroughly enjoy thinking about some of my blog entries, before I write them (hence my Facebook post last night). I had some general ideas/concepts/people I wanted to blog about, but wasn't exactly sure how to tie them all together. To be perfectly honest, I'm still not 100% sure. But whatever, that's the fun part of blogging.... you just write and it takes you where it takes you (deep, I know).

Anyone that knows me, knows that I loved college. No, I mean I LOVED COLLEGE. I was that girl - you know, the really overly-involved (almost annoying to the point involved?!), BFF with college administrators, went to most of my classes, and dressed up on a daily basis. I was that girl. One of the reasons I feel in love with Hartwick, was because of the smaller size. I was involved in HS and I wasn't prepared to get lost in the crowd at college. Hartwick was home to me, the minute I stepped on it's campus (I am NOT exaggerating - just ask Carol). Needless to say, I succeeded in taking every advantage of college, while having the best time of my life.

There are two things I NEVER thought I would do in college - be a college athlete and join a sorority. Both, proved to be false. There are two things that are my favorite memories from college - my swim team and my sorority. Lesson here? I do believe so.  I owe everything to my swim team and what I learned there. I absolutely loved that piece of my life. But, this blog, will focus on the later... AOII.

The majority of girls that join a sorority always say "they never had planned on it." Exhibit A. And then the ones that say that, do it, and they love it. Again, exhibit A. To be clear, I was NEVER the "rah rah" kind of sorority woman "(I'm pretty sure, yup 100% positive I gave STRICT INSTRUCTIONS NOT TO DO TOAST AT MY WEDDING. Guess what was done? Toast). I was rather, what one might have called the "house mom." Take it for what's worth. Either way, I loved it.  I mean, don't get me wrong I hated the stupid fights and the stupid drama, the house meetings on Sunday that SERIOUSLY WENT FOR HOURS ABOUT NOTHING, finding your laundry on top of the dryer when someone else moved it for you, the filth in the kitchen, trying to find a spot in the back to park, and the crazy lack of sleep. But, I loved the friendships, the conversation at 2 a.m in the kitchen,  J-Term tv addictions to the Bachelor, the "morning after" conversations, and all the inside, stupid-crazy jokes/things we did (none of which will be mentioned here).

Almost 10 years later... I still consider myself to be good friends with a portion of the girls in my sorority. I take pride in that, considering the majority live in NY and I live in MI (the only thing I hate about living in MI and is how far away I am from these girls). But, it just goes to show, that the bond and friendships we developed through this group - through this sorority - did matter and still matters.
Which brings me to this:

Late Tuesday night, I receive this FB message from E.H.:

"Sue, where's the blog. I need some blog to keep me going on my diet/work-out."

My text message response back to her on Wednesday:

"How about you inspire yourself and me and commit to a triathlon relay this summer with S.G. and myself?"

10 minutes later E.H. called. Two days later, we plan on completing this triathlon:

North Country Tri

(Side note - but huge shout-out to E.H. for agreeing to this. S.G. has completed numerous races - she is actually the one that started me on running in college. I am proud of S.G. for agreeing to this as well. But, E.H. - I give you props. Its the first one and you jumped in, feet first. Ride that bike girl... you'll be awesome. S.G. - I know you will be fabulous. You always are. )

As a number of us turn 30 this year, I think this is awesome. Two days after my own 30th birthday, I will be relaying-it up with two of my best friends. I love that shit. And I have a feeling we will have some other fabulous and amazing friends on the sideline cheering us on. I'm already proud of my relay-mates and its only January.

These are the type of relationships that matter. These are the type of adventures that matter.

In the spring of 2001, my life changed forever. I did something I never thought I would have done. I have no regrets. And 8 years later, these same amazing woman continue to positively impact my life, make me smile, and will always get it - even from three states away.

Running is my enemy

I really don't like to run. In fact, I almost hate it. It doesn't clear my head and bring me to a happy place, like it does for some. Swimming, now swimming, does that for me. However, if I am serious about 70.3 (and I AM serious about it), I must learn to embrace running. I need to find a way to enjoy it more than I do. I can swim from here to NY and back, but not so much with the run.

I thought training for a half-marathon this past fall, would help me overcome my hate relationship with running. I can't say that it did that. I can say, it taught me that I can, indeed, run MUCH farther than I ever thought I could. And I know I CAN run 13.1

NOW, I just need to put 13.1 after a 1.2 mile swim and a 56 mile bike. Thus, 70.3.

Troy and I just returned from a winter night run. I decided to turn into a sprint work-out. A mile warm-up, 2 miles of 3 minute sprint and a minute walk, followed by a cool down. It sounds easier than it is. Its the kind of running that makes your heart beat out of your chest and your legs throb when you are finished.

They say that triathlons are either won or lost on the run. I'm not planning on losing anytime soon.